Bridesmaid ghosted Bachelorette weekend, should I say something?

Relationships/Family

This past weekend was my Bachelorette trip and while it was great, this one thing continues to bother me.

For context, I have 2 maids of honor, my best friends who I have known equally for years, and 4 bridesmaids; my little sister who was not able to come (lives 8 hours away) and my 3 future sister in laws. Of the sister in laws, 2 of them are married to my fiancés older brothers ("Ava & Tina") and the one is my fiancés only sister "Lisa".

MOHs started planning the bach weekend about 9 months ago as the house we were renting books quickly and we were getting it for a super discounted rate because one of my MOH is family friends with the people who own it. The house was fairly local, less than an hour drive for the whole group. We finalized details for it back in June, and from there communication happened in a group chat among just the bridesmaids, keeping details a surprise for me.

Since then, there were a couple times my MOHs asked me if Lisa was getting the texts as she wasn't saying anything in the group chat or double checking they had the right number. I said I was sure she was, just very busy as she is a teacher at the same school as my fiance and I knew how busy they were with Back to School prep. I even asked my fiance to talk to Lisa too in making sure she was getting their messages.

Day 1 of bach, get to the house, the MOHs and the 2 sister in laws are there. No one makes mention of Lisa and when we are at dinner there is no mention of another person coming. At this point I pull one of the MOH aside and ask where Lisa is. She says that Lisa wasn't able to make it. Okay bummer.

Later on I'm calling fiance before bed and mention that Lisa didn't come. He tells me that she did not have the funds for the trip and couldn't afford it. I totally get it, I've had to make those calls before in not being able to go on a trip with friends or family because of that same reason.

But what hurts is that there was no text or call or acknowledgement from Lisa herself telling me she wouldn't be there. Since we first started planning for the bach, Ava had a baby in July and gave me the heads up she wouldn't be staying over night as she wasn't ready to leave her newborn yet. The other sister in law Tina also found out her husband scheduled a cruise for them without realizing it was the same weekend, and told me she wouldn't be there. Ultimately they canceled when Tina found out she was pregnant and came to the bach instead (she was able to still stay for the bach as it was mostly chilling and relaxing by the pool).

When debriefing about the weekend with fiance that Lisa only responded back to his texts the day of the trip and he in turn gave the info to the MOHs. Should I say something to this bridesmaid? I don't want to ruffle feathers as she is someone who will always be in the family, not just a friend or acquaintance, but I am a bit hurt by the nonexistent communication.

Posted Sep 21, 2026, 6:27 PM UTC

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