Life, Family, Lost in thoughts. M 34, Vent

P1

Recently I am feeling and realising hundreds of things. I have the option to think about that, to ignore, keep watching something online and keep living, be silent and do nothing or maybe all of these together.

I know I can decide and I have control to choose but i thought maybe i should let it out, maybe I should just start writing as i don't expect suggestions or solutions but maybe just post and feel like someone is listening with no judgement.

Whenever I can i will continue adding in parts.

I don't mean to offend anyone but just life, how I see it. A normal middle class indian family pov.

1. Love:

who loves you unconditionally:

Dad: They can never appreciate a son, their unconditional love can be for the daughter but not the son.

Mother: Even though mother's love has no limits, it changes between brothers based on what you do. You can't hurt her but she keeps hurting you unknowingly.

Spouse/partner: Love comes only when we fit certain boxes like x property, x salary, x beauty...

Siblings: Maybe a brother's love for sister is unconditional but a brother's love for brother change as per what you both do, how you both live, your partners...

Relatives: I know there are some lucky people but for most they are worst than enemies.

Yourself: Taking care of everyone slowly you stop even understanding your own existence so how can we think about love.

And we keep saying we love our family/partner/...