Big4 PIP - Need some help!

Hi,

Long story short, deep down I know I wasn’t performing the best to the extent I can actually!

I hold the most prestigious degrees in my team, graduated from the best engineering and business schools of the country which were potential dream universities for ALL OF MY COLLEAGUES!
But I just wasn’t happy where I ended up being. I didn’t belong in this team is what I always used to feel since day one. Everyone always used to hype me up due to my academic credentials that they expected more out of me. Things were not good at home already and I wasn’t working in the domain I really wanted to which led to me being frustrated and anxious all the time.

But here’s the thing, I wasn’t that bad that they would put me on a PIP. I busted my ass for 3 months straight during a critical stage of a project working over the weekends as well and until 5AM in the morning (I started late those days). I lost my appetite and weight - didn’t have breakfast for a single day those 3 months. My mental health went for a toss that my mother got so concerned about me getting weaker and leaner every day. I had suffered a knee fracture months prior to this and wasn’t able to attend the hospital for my physiotherapy sessions for 3 months straight! I fucking worked over my birthday, over Christmas and every public holiday for those 3-4 months and I got a PIP in reward.

Things are already stressful at home. My father’s sick and depends upon my mother and me for everything. I don’t wanna lose any income stream at this point of time. My Partner is an asshole who forced my previous manager to write a bad feedback for me just before leaving.

My current manager said, he’s ready to help me but I don’t believe anyone anymore since he’s been working under the same Partner for more than a decade. He told me I can challenge the PIP when HR will send an email.

I have a hell lot of emails showing that I was working at nights and over the weekends and Christmas. I have an email from my Partner on a Sunday evening asking me and my colleague to work to which I replied I cannot due to some personal commitments on a FUCKING SUNDAY.

Any suggestions would be really helpful!