I (25M) ended my relationship with my girlfriend (23F). Should I reach out one last time or give her space?

I (25M) ended my relationship with my girlfriend (23F) yesterday. We’ve known each other for about 6 years, originally dating as high school sweethearts before eventually finding our way back to each other.

I’m moving across the country soon, and although I love her deeply, there were trust issues in our relationship that I couldn’t get past. With the distance coming, I started questioning whether we had a strong enough foundation to make long distance work.

We initially said our goodbyes with the intention of staying together. After I left, I sat in a random parking lot for about an hour thinking about everything. Something in me kept telling me that going into long distance with these doubts wasn’t right. I eventually drove back and ended the relationship.

She was devastated, and seeing her like that has been extremely difficult for me. From her perspective, she feels like I led her on and gave her hope that we were going to make long distance work, only to come back and end everything. She sent me a very angry message afterward and made it clear how deeply hurt she is and that she doesn’t want me in her life.

This was the message: Thank you for showing me that you were never the person I wanted to believe in or defended you as. I feel like such an idiot and should’ve listened to my friends from the beginning.
Thankfully, you will no longer be in my life, and I will NEVER let you hurt me again. You threw away someone who genuinely loved you, and one day you’re going to realize exactly what you lost. I hope you regret this forever, but thankfully that will never be my problem again.

I understand why she feels that way. I also feel terrible because hurting her was never my intention. None of our relationship was fake to me. I genuinely loved her, still love her, and cared deeply about making her happy. I didn’t drive back because I stopped loving her. I drove back because I realized I couldn’t promise her a future that I wasn’t certain I could follow through on.

Now I have this overwhelming urge to reach out one last time. Not to convince her to take me back or change the decision, but because I hate the thought of her walking away believing that I never cared about her or that I intentionally led her on.
At the same time, I realize an apology or explanation might be more for my own peace of mind than hers. She may need space to be angry and process everything without hearing from me again.

After knowing someone for 6 years, I just never imagined things would end with this much anger between us.
Would sending one final apology/explanation be appropriate, or should I respect what she said and leave her alone?

I need some advice please

Posted Sep 23, 2026, 8:34 AM UTC

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