so tired of this pain

I’m really struggling. I’m 30 and have struggled with my mental health since age 12. depression, anxiety, complex PTSD etc. Hospitalised in my teens, two inpatient psychiatric stays, multiple overdoses lots of SH etc.

I developed long covid and then ME/CFS and this past year i’ve got sicker and sicker, to the point I’m now mostly bedbound and have to be in a dark room all day. I can’t manage reading, watching TV, washing more than once every few weeks, phone calls and talking exhaust me, I am alone almost all the time and it’s making my mental health so much worse. There is no cure or treatment for ME, some off label meds that sometimes help but no guarantee.

Being this sick would be a bit more bearable if I felt supported and looked after by family but I’m living in a house share. I’m trying to sort out moving to my dad’s but it involves probably rehoming my cat which is so devastating I know it sounds silly but he’s one of the only things I have left

I want to carry on living but life is hell mentally and physically and I keep trying to explain to my parents how bad things are and not feeling listened to. I fe el so trapped and afraid. I don’t know what to do.