Resources for finding an attorney that has experience in specific situations

Location: NC specifically triad area

Does anyone know of any resources to assist in finding a lawyer that has experience in specific situations like mental illness, other than just cold calling?

I am in a custody battle with a my ex gf of 16 years. She has never allowed herself to be diagnosed but she has mental health issues, she has admitted many times to thinking she has problems. I don't like to use the term victim but for years I have been the victim of mental/psychological abuse of what my psychologist believes is a mix of bi-polar and narcissistic disorder. The sad part is I fell in so deep that I didn't even realize it was happening and the worst part is it was happening to our kids and wasn't strong enough to stand up for them.

So a few months ago a simple discussion turned into my gf of 16 years taking the kids and running 280 miles back to where we moved from just a year ago (we moved because she hates her dad and family so much she wanted away from them that far). Then she filed a DVPO which luckily was denied because her accusations were completely ridiculous and literally had nothing in it that said I was a current threat. We had to have a hearing even though it was denied and she voluntarily dismissed that but immediately filed for emergency custody using the same accusations. So here we are in that battle. When she left she literally dropped our 16 year relationship like it was a one night stand and we had not been having issues, fights, anything of that nature.

Now I know with her not being diagnosed it is hard to get courts to listen but I have a lot of evidence showing a very substantial pattern of things she has been doing. But here is the key, now that I'm not there to take the brunt of the abuse our 3 children are getting it and the things happening are very alarming. Our kids are 12, 10, almost 3, all girls, and I have always had a great relationship with them. As a matter of fact I have been the person that almost 100% takes care of them for years now, I'm on disability and am at home with them. Now since my ex left and kept them from me for months my 12 year old will barely speak to me, she tells me her mother has been showing and telling her everything happening in court and the text messages I've sent trying to speak to her about her mental situation. This child says she can't remember a single good time we've had, I even had to have a conversation about suicide with her that she initiated and that scared me, her young mind is so messed up right now yet her mother just keeps doing things to make it worse.

My middle child and my youngest are my mini me kids, and because of that they are being treated poorly. My middle child used to be a happy kid that always wanted to be outside with me but now all she does is sit and stare. She told me a couple weekends ago that she doesn't feel like she is apart of the family because how her mother treats her like a slave, she has to clean up every mess whether she made it or not, and has to watch the 3 year old like she is the mother. I'm not a perfect man or father but dang it I've always lived to make sure my family was taken care of and now I can't even protect my kids from harm from their own mother, our kids mental states are terrible and I can't get anyone to help. The only reason their mother is doing everything is to be vindictive towards me because she knows the children and her are literally my whole world, she isn't a great mother thanks to her mental situation hence why I was the primary parent to our children. Man how I wish i would have been stronger and gotten our kids away before this.

Sorry for the long story I'm just terribly frustrated with what my children are going through. I'm hoping there is a way to find someone that can do better than my current lawyer, I'm just not sure i trust him because of some things he has done, or said he would do and didn't. This is not a case of two individuals who were having trouble in a relationship as far as arguing and fighting, I have the evidence to show we were literally doing okay the days leading up to and the morning of. I now understand we weren't okay because it was nothing more than the pattern of love bombing then discard but I use the term okay to say that there was not a pattern of traditional relationship issues and the leaving literally came out of nowhere and was over something as ridiculous as a simple discussion of something she caused and as usual refused to take accountability for.

Hopefully someone knows of a way to find lawyers that have this specific knowledge other than cold calling because so far that has gotten me nowhere. Thanks.