Hi I (36F) recently broke up with my ex bf (30M). For context. We dated for 9 months and the entire relationship was up and down. He was incredibly insecure and exhibited behaviors of mate guarding, pocketing, lovebombing, darvo and most recently narcissism and manipulation which drove me to breaking up with him Aug 2nd. 

I was tired of him cyberstalking me and making passive aggressive remarks suggesting I was cheating on him. I had previously been in a 3 year abusive relationship that I have been healing from. His behavior in our relationship began to trigger my trauma from that prior relationship and I had began going to therapy from March - May until I couldn't afford it any longer. 

Attached are conversations we have had since the break up. He is struggling to accept that it is over and is habitually reaching out to me to see if I'm interested in him. I had planned to go on a solo trip to a concert this Sunday Sept 27 and while we were still together he decided to insert himself into my trip. Reluctantly I said yes but then we broke up. Each interaction with him is making me less and less interested in attending the concert with him.

Sept 21 he made the decision to drop a seed of past drama to my best friend to draw up an old wound fresh again which resulted in me sending her screenshots of what had transpired between me and him. I was venting to him and being critical of my best friends behavior and personality. He decided to randomly drop what I said to her to start a whole conflict. 

I suspect he was upset that I declined his most recent pitch to get back together and retaliated out of anger to make me suffer which in collateral damage made my best friend suffer. I am not posting the screen shots involving my friend and I but I am explaining what he did. After she and I hashed things out and had an understanding I messaged him asking him to leave my friends alone and that if he has issues with me he can speak to me directly.

I am upset with him because when we were dating I confided in him in privacy very vulnerable and sensitive information. And you expect to have confidentiality and your partner to uphold values of keeping that information safe and private. For him to go behind my back to snitch onto my friend about something I said in the past that she already forgave me for was a low blow. That betrayal is very hurtful and it demonstrates that he cannot be trusted and that he is willing to retaliate and use ammo to my loved ones to get to me.

He is lovebombing my friends and telling everyone that I never loved him and that I was not invested etc. 

The plan is for him to come over and we carpool to the concert together.

I personally hate driving to Philadelphia and my car needs some work done so it is just convenient to carpool with him. I have a parking pass so we both benefit for different reasons. However, he has been manipulating me and my friends and playing the victim on Facebook and contradicting himself.

He has not been physically violent but he has been psychologically and emotionally abusive. I'm not sure if I am disrespecting my self and self worth and safety by even considering getting into the car with him and being with him for roughly 8 hrs. I don't think he would do anything to harm me but I'm paranoid from true crime consumption and trauma from my previous abusive relationship and I'm at a crossroads.

Do I prioritize myself my safety and self worth and drive to Philly for the concert alone and be cordial with my ex bf while we are in proximity or do I allow myself the benefit of not driving and letting him have access to me?

It sounds like a no brainer but I have been deliberating in my head for 2 days now. My friends say I should block his ass and never look back. But I did want a friendship with him but idk if that is even possible or worth it.

What do I do?

Should I go with my ex bf or separately?