I started prep around this time last year.

PW OnlyIAS ka foundation somehow complete bhi kar liya tha… but revise nahi kiya 

So obviously ab kuch yaad nahi hai lol.

Then June ke around SSC etc. start kiya.

Maths mein Number System, HCF-LCM bas.

Reasoning mein ek chapter.

CA ka ek month daily follow kiya, notes bhi banaye.

Geo ke 6-7 chapters.

Medieval History ka overview.

And bas… that’s my “1 year of preparation” 

Consistency is literally zero

Uae kiske kuch reasons hai like kuch toh ye ki

Shifting aur kri khi construction aur chl rhi hai toh set up ni ho parha

Tier 1 city se gaav me aagye, yha privacy zero hai, so rhe ho late tak toh gaali Sunni ko milti padosyion se

Ab ek saal hone wala hai and I still feel like I’m at ZERO.

People of my age have given their first attempt this year,..

zyada frustrating ye hai ki padhne ka mann bhi hai, karna bhi hai… bas consistency ban hi nahi rahi.

Lib join ki thi bandar hai gaav me first day hi kaat liya jha mai ab hu

Dusre gaav me nhi the, pr vha mental peace nhi thi

Yha aana jana bhi hot hota hai

Kya karu

Like smjh hi nhi rha

Pure din rou rou mann rhta hai

Kuch hoga bhi ya nhi

Kyuki mujhe pta hai kuch na kuch kr lungi agar ache se Krliya toh ek baar

pr bhi oversensitive, overthinker and overactive mind hai

Yha k log bhot brutal hote hai smjh nhi aata kya kru

Agar mujhe subh uthte hi kisi ne kuch bol diya toh m pure din kuch nhi pdh paungi

Mujhse hoga hi nhi literally 

I am following up to the psych dept too

But still zero positive response 

Don't know what to do

Aisa nhi hai ki mann nhi hai

Mann hai pr subh uthti hi thaki hui hu

Health bhi thik nhi hai na hi physically na hi mentally 

Idk but it feels like I wasted an Entire Year 🥀