I need a why !

Beating my shit is cool, but I seriously want to stop forever. My longest streak was 33 days and I felt like a juggernaut. I’m walking around no haircut, bummy clothes and have beautiful women burning a hole in the side of my face. Them 33 days came from being brunt out to the MAX on pmo, etc.

Since then, my longest has been 4 days🤦🏽‍♂️.

I need a why to stop beating it and sticking to it.