When family asks for financial help, do you tell your partner everything?

I’m curious how other people handle this.

Say a parent or sibling asks you for financial help. Maybe it’s for a medical bill, rent, debt, a repair, or just because they’re having a difficult month.

If you have a spouse or partner, do you always discuss it with them before giving the money?

Part of me thinks it should be a joint decision if you share finances. But I can also understand why someone might feel that helping their own parent or sibling is a personal choice, especially if the money is coming from their own income.

Where does it get complicated?

What if your partner thinks the family member is taking advantage of you?

What if you know your partner would say no, but you feel like you can't leave your family without help?

And what if you've helped before, so saying no this time feels almost impossible?

I’m not really looking for a “right” answer. I’m more interested in how people actually handle this in real life.

If you've been in this situation, what worked for you and what definitely didn't?