I’m catching feelings for an NCO and she’s reciprocating. What do I do?

I know this is a stupid ass subject to being onto the subreddit, but I need advice.

As the title suggests, an NCO in my platoon and I (a Specialist) have grown very close over the last year I’ve spent at my duty station. We have eachother saved under first names with personal phone numbers and we talk very often. A few months ago, with a bit of liquid courage, I asked her if she would like to have dinner with me. She said yes and we went out to dinner. Nothing fancy just chilis. One dinner turned into two, two turned into several, and from there it turned into a weekly thing where we make plans on the weekends to see eachother. She’s directly in my chain of command (team leader) and we talk every single day at work and text every day after work. I bought her flowers to one of our rendezvous and we began to exchange gifts. Slowly the gifts became more of what a couple would gift eachother. (flowers, chocolates, cologne/perfume, she even bought me a semi expensive watch for my birthday) I realized about a month ago I really want to pursue a relationship with her, and she has voiced wanting to get to know me closer, to include inviting me out to bars in the nearby big-entertainment city and about a week ago we kissed.

We never let our personal relationship get in the way of work, I still go to parade rest for her, call her Sergeant, and do everything she says per regulation. In fact I’m willing to say my work has improved being under her since we started talking. We aren’t a cringe mil-couple that is constantly touching up on eachother and saying all sorts of stupid shit to one another and while at work.

Shes never been married, doesn’t have kids, is only 4 years older than me and is very attractive. I don’t want to get her in trouble but I don’t want to stop seeing her. She’s helped me through a few rough times in my career and I really enjoy her companionship. I don’t know what to do and I’m stuck in a stalemate between my personal feelings and sparing both of our careers. (mainly hers, considering she’s the NCO and would bare most of the responsibility)

Do I just continue on like it always has been, or cut it off? Like I said, This is a stupid subject to bring onto the subreddit but I just want outside advice.

Posted Sep 30, 2026, 3:36 AM UTC

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