Can people who identify as Voidgirl tell me about themselves, their gender, and how the figured out that they were Voidgirl, so that I can also figure out if i’m one?

I also posted this on the Agender subreddit, but got no replies, so I’m posting this here aswell!

I’m AFAB. And i’ve never questioned my gender until very recently, when I saw someone say that people could feel their gender, and I realised that I felt nothing. And I also have Alexithymia which makes the entire process of trying to figure out my gender even trickier for me, so I can’t help but look to you folks for advice. You guys also don’t have to read this entire post if you don’t want to! You can just answer the question in the title if thats what you prefer!

I love femininity. I love dresses, make-up (mostly on other people, but I do like the look of eye makeup on myself), painting my nails, etc. I also have hobbies that are considered traditionally feminine. But I don’t feel like a woman. I just feel like “me”.

The best way I can explain my relationship to femininity and womanhood is like if a genderless/formless alien or robot found the first thing it found nice to look at and formed it’s entire being around it. I love the way women look and their mannerisms, so I try to mimic those things, but they don’t come naturally to me.

I‘ve also never automatically included myself in conversations about women. It is always “they”, ”them”, “their”, rather than, “We”, ”Us”, or “Ours”, until I remember that I’m supposed to also be a woman. When I was a child, before I knew that my gender had been assigned to me based on my genitalia, I would often wonder if I was secretly a boy, and my family had been hiding it from me. It wasn’t because I wanted to be a boy, and looking at it now, maybe it was because I didn’t feel like a girl either.

I like dressing femininely, but it is never because it makes me look like a girl, or that it makes me feel like a pretty girl. Dressing femininely just makes me feel nice (until I have to climb up stairs) or just pretty. I’ve never engaged in a hobby because it was a “girly hobby”, I simply engage in hobbies that I feel drawn to, and most of them happen to be traditionally enjoyed by women.

I like the idea of having dainty hands, but that isn’t really a woman only thing. But at the same time, I love the idea of being taller and stronger. I would love it if I could change what my chest looks like depending on the situation.

I also feel like if I had a gender, I would be a girl, but that part of me just kinda…got lost in transit, I guess. So for now, I’m just a void/alien/robot that likes to cosplay being a girl for funsies.

So, could I potentially be Voidgirl?