Am I(23F) being unreasonable about not wanting to stay at my boyfriend’s(23M) place during the work week?
My boyfriend and I have been together for 4 years, but we still live separately.
He wants me to stay at his place during the week, but I’ve been pretty firm that I don’t want to spend the night there on work days. Weekends are totally fine, and I’ve told him that.
I work remotely, and he keeps saying that he could just drive me home in the morning, so I don’t really see what the big deal is. But that doesn’t really solve it for me. I’d still have to wake up, get ready, leave his place, drive home, etc., and that’s still taking time out of my morning.
I do have stuff at his place to get ready, so it’s not like I’m saying I can’t stay because I don’t have a toothbrush or clothes or whatever. That’s not really the point. I just really like my morning routine. I like waking up at home, having my normal routine, and not feeling rushed before work. Sleep and work are both really important to me, so I don’t want to mess with that during the week.
He says he still doesn’t understand why it matters so much and thinks it should be easy for me to just stay over and have him drive me home. But for me, it’s not really about whether it’s possible or convenient. I just don’t want to.
I’ve told him I’m happy to spend the night on weekends, but he says weekends aren’t enough. I get that he wants to spend more time together, especially after being together for 4 years, but I’ve basically told him that this is just something I’m firm on.
I feel like he keeps trying to find a workaround when I’ve already told him I don’t want to do it lol.
Am I being unreasonable?
TL;DR My boyfriend wants me to stay over on work nights, but I prefer sleeping at home because I value my sleep and morning routine. I’m happy to stay over on weekends, but he says that’s not enough.
Posted Sep 30, 2026, 4:13 AM UTC