"I did what so many other people who join ... do: I lost all sense of individual identity in the name of the cult."

Another whistleblower has spoken out about Scientology - the parallels between the Scientology experience and the SGI-USA experience are shocking:

When Carmen, 41, first set foot in the church's Celebrity Centre, at the age of 20, she describes getting a "horrible feeling," but she pursued the religion to save her marriage.

wisetaiten had that same reaction the first time she entered a community center, but she ended up getting suckered in eventually anyhow. And cultalert stayed in the SGI cult longer than he might have, because he believed he could use the practice to fix his marriage.

"When I think back, I believe a part of me knew if I didn't accept Scientology the marriage would be over before it even started. Regardless of how different I feel about Jason and Scientology today, I was very much in love with the guy and wanted our marriage to work. I did what I thought was right. But I made the mistake of immersing myself completely in his world. I did what so many other people who join Scientology do: I lost all sense of individual identity in the name of the cult."

That paragraph describes my own experience exactly. Similarly, I joined to keep a boyfriend, and his wishy-washyness toward our relationship provided a "perfect storm" for getting sucked in. First of all, he was impressed that I was able to read the gongyo from the very beginning and that I started chanting; secondly, the whole "chant for whatever you want" led to me chanting to change his behavior for the better. As with so many relationships, the 3-week "honeymoon" period, during which he was on his best behavior, proved to be completely different from the reality once he felt he no longer needed to pursue me and win me. But enough about me - let's continue:

"As we kept going, it occurred to me how unreal and expensive Scientology was going to be," she said, adding that she realized that membership would cost her upwards of $50,000. "To me, Scientology seemed more of a surreal lifestyle for the privileged than a kind of belief system."

Well, THAT's a little different, as the SGI begs money but not to the same degree or in the same number of digits as Scientology does. Still, take a look at SGI's real estate holdings some time, and think to yourself, "Hmmm...I wonder where all the money needed to BUY those came from."

However, she wouldn't dare express her feelings.

She already understood how conditional the group's acceptance was, and how horrid they were to any who disagreed with the group - just like SGI!

"You'd never think that speaking your mind could get you in that much trouble, but if you knew what the average Scientologist's perspective was on friendships you'd understand," she writes. "In Scientology, your friend can become your worst enemy overnight."

Or the moment your cult "friend" realizes you aren't adequately in thrall to the cult. Intolerant groups are like that; if you're in, you're okay, but as soon as you aren't playing ball and going along with all their nonsense, the shunning begins. There's no real human feeling involved, just evaluations of who's adequately loyal/obedient to the cult.

In her essay, she describes the awful sensation when her closest confidantes (including actress Jenna Elfman) turned on her after she was deemed a "Suppressive Person," or "the worst thing you can be in Scientology.

Yep, been there, done that.

Even her former husband sent her a "disconnection letter."

Quelle surprise (eye roll)

When she finally left, Carmen said her world basically shattered. "Nothing that I knew was ever the same. I lost every friend and source of love I knew besides my family in Georgia, 3,000 miles away. I was completely on my own and not one of them cared.

Oh, they cared enough to exploit that vulnerability when the opportunity presented itself O_O

What I didn't expect to happen was that Gay [a Scientologist] would get my agent at United Talent Agency to drop me. Or at least that's what she told me in her disconnection letter I received. So I had no way of even getting work. I was supposed to start over."

Yep, if you commit the unforgivable sin of leaving the most perfect, necessary, beneficial organization in the world, you will walk out alone. You will not retain a single friend; for your "friends" in an intolerant cult (like Scientology, like SGI), your only characteristic that truly matters is whether you're a good enough member of the group or not. You will not be valued for anything else in the end.

Carmen, who now lives in Atlanta with her partner and twins, says that she is speaking out now to help "other survivors who have suffered through the experiences of predatory cults," adding, "Scientologists have no boundaries and their cruelties exclude no one." - from here, full essay here.

This is exactly why we speak out as well.