TIFU by making pot brownies...

This happened over last Christmas break... I apologize for the length of this, as a lot happened.

A little background info: (17M).. at this time I had a girlfriend of a year and a half who had never been high yet... We'll refer to my best friend (Meijers guy), as Joe... my other friend as Tom, and my girlfriend as Sarah.

It all started with the 'great idea'! Joe and I were screwing around in Meijers when we found ourselves in the food section... more specifically the baking aisle. Joe and I stopped in our tracks when we saw some brownie mix. The, "are you thinking what I'm thinking?" line came out... "YES! Dude, my parents are leaving all weekend too." This had to be the best idea we've had yet... timing was so perfect. Man, I was so so wrong...

It was a Saturday and everyone was showing up to my house at different times... I had two friends coming, (including the one from Meijers), and Sarah was supposed to stop by after work.

Cutting to the chase... I had a lot of weed... just for this occasion. I followed the recipe by the book! Careful not to screw anything up... but Joe and I had this 'strong' feeling that this thing wouldn't even work anyway...

Tom arrived, and I'm in the kitchen baking like a master chef. The oil is now finished and it's time to start baking the brownies. We throw them in the oven, and our mouths drool at the thought of some delicious brownies laced with pot.

Fast forward a bit, the brownies our done... me having ABSOLUTELY zero experience in the edible field said, "Hey, you want to try a few?" We cut the brownies into normal sized pieces and ate two... Sarah shows up thirty minutes later. We're all chilling in my living room for awhile when I start to feel it. Damn, these things really work! Tom and I, stupidly agreed to eat more. Sarah ate ONE brownie.

The night is progressing, and Tom and I are really starting to soar high. At some point, him and I ate two more brownies... we had ordered a delicious pizza that had been delivered by Sarah. And it was just sitting there waiting to be feasted upon...

Some time passed, (no idea how much time), and this is when I realized, TIFU.

I remember a split second of being in my kitchen and something, as fast as a gun hit me, I was absolutely and positively f*cked. I'm trying to embrace and have a little fun, but that all changed within ten minues, I couldn't handle it anymore.

Sarah was acting a little strange, and I noticed she had gone up to my room. Tom stayed downstairs, with the pizza.. I go up to my room and she's laying face down on my bed. I think I lay beside her for fifteen minutes without saying a word, which is just weird for me. I can see she is in distress. That's when she starts saying stuff like, "OP, I'M GOING TO DIE!" "PLEASE CALL SOMEONE".... it escalated very quickly and full paranoia set in. I am too high to even comprehend this situation by now. I was in a full blown panic attack but in the back of my mind I kept telling myself, "you can't die from pot brownies, you'll be okay." Sarah continues screaming.. this continues for 15 minutes, as I try to calm her down... Eventually being as high as I was, and knowing how cool her mom is... she dials her mom's number... she's on the phone screaming the things she screamed to me. I sit there in draught, ashamed by my actions of doing this to her... fast forward, her step dad arrives... her mom was asleep this entire time and she actually spoke to her step dad. He arrives at my front door, seeming as though he wants to knock my front door down and Sarah forces the door open and says something along the lines of, "we tried weed." He replies, "get your shoes," with a stern look on his face.

I am still going up and up... I'm so high I can't even comprehend what is happening. Sarah leaves, and I turn to Tom who's sitting there looking like he just saw a ghost.

Maybe I'll go take my emotions out on some mad pizza... I go to the kitchen, (if I can be any amount of excited at this point, I am) open the pizza box, and the pizza is gone.. all gone... not a single damn crumb.. this pizza was HUGE. It could have fed five people and still had some left over. Tom ate the whole damn pizza. F*ck, was this a dream I was in? I often asked myself that.

Fast forward a bit, Joe arrives. He comes into my room to find Tom and I sprawled out like we're paralyzed from the neck down. He says something along the lines of, "Holy sht, you guys seriously look like absolute death." He was laughing while he said this, and the state of mind I was in I told him to shut up... Even though I felt like talking was taking just as much energy as running a marathon, I filled him in on the situation between Sarah and I. He can't believe it. At this point, I honestly don't even know if I believed it myself? Did Sarah even actually come to my house, and get totally fcked by pot brownies?

Joe understands that these satanic brownies are too potent for him but decides to roll a blunt. I say, and I quote, "Joe, please don't smoke, I feel like there's demons that are trying to hold me back from saying that, but please don't get high, they'll get you too." Joe is laughing his ass off by now, rolling his blunt and precedes to go outside and smoke.

Fast forwarding, he comes back in as high as a kite. I'm still laying on my bed, not even moving a muscle, because, I simply can't. Tom is in the same condition. Joe is having the time of his life. I can't really remember what happened from this point, except for Joe forcing two more brownies down Tom's throat saying they were Häagen-Dazs brownies from the gas station, how the f*ck did he fall for that? And, how did this kid eat so much? I also recall Joe at some points furiously latching his hands onto Tom's tits and shaking them, which was the first point I even giggled a little, all night.

At some point I passed out. I was awoken as 9am by Joe, who had to go to work... he was feeling better than he ever has, ready to go make some bank. I'm STILL HIGH. I can't believe it. I go back to bed. I wake up at noon, feeling a little better... but so very, very out of it. I think I exchanged some words with Tom, and he departed for home.

Time to deal with the girlfriend, I send text, and call, to no avail. I get no replies. I think I eventually go back to bed for a bit. I wake up, and realize that I had to sing in a damn gig today, with my friend Joe. Fast forwarding to the show, I am still so out of it... Sarah still hasn't replied. The show went well for the others... but when it was my turn I knew it was still terrible circumstance to be singing in. I forgot some words during some of my songs, and probably just looked like I was on something to the entire crowd.

The next day, I precede to send more texts and calls to Sarah, but as before I get no reply. I get ready and head to her house.. I'm greeted by her parents, who actually aren't mad at me. "She's been sleeping most the time, are you sure the pot wasn't laced with anything?" Yes I'm sure, and I filled them in on just how powerful and edible can be... I find her in her room, and gently wake her up. She is so out of it. Honestly comparable to a toddler, not fully understanding her surroundings and severe depersonalization. My heart sank. Did I just screw someone's life up forever?

Fast fowarding, this went on for three days of her feeling like this... I was with her as much as I could. On the fourth day, I decided we needed to get out of the house and go to Chipotle and maybe take a stop at the mall. We got Chipotle, and felt too shitty to even think about going anywhere else so we headed for home, and picked up some Nyquil Sleepy Time.

We slept 8 hours straight that day. When we woke up, my heart missed a beat when she said, "I'm feeling much better." I instantly felt like the biggest weight had ever been lifted off my shoulders.

Never again will I eat more than one edible, never again will I invite my girlfriend over to join in.

Yes, I do also realize it was a terrible idea to get high on edibles for someone on their first time, but she persistently insisted.

Thanks for reading.

TL;DR: Got too screwed up on pot brownies, and started a chain of events I will never forget.