[Crit] First time writing a personal statement. How can I further improve?

The essay will be submitted to universities in California and I am trying to make it the best it can be. Thank you for the help.

The Prompt

Describe the world you come from — for example, your family, community or school — and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.

Survive and Prosper, those are the two main ideas that constantly runs through the mind of an immigrant. An immigrant must be willing to survive through the cruelties of life while making the necessary sacrifices to still provide the basic necessities for the family. Only after an individual takes those mandatory steps will prosperity present itself to the family. Those are the very same ideas that motivated my father to pack our bags and travel across the world to America, the land where dreams come true. Everyday my father would talk to me about his great vision of the future and how we would capture the American dream and live a better life than the one we had in the Philippines. I was captivated by my father's words and decided to wholeheartedly support any decision that would further the cause. However, the American Dream is not something that can be accomplished in one flight, a lesson my childhood self learned the hard way. For the next 3 years, the family that dreamed big had to start out small by living in a place where a person would normally park a car, the garage. Every single day was a struggle for us since money was scarce and the only funds we had available were borrowed from relatives; therefore, our living conditions were not favorable. Conservation became a top priority; every single penny was saved unless an emergency occurred. The family continued to save money by limiting food consumption to only lunch and dinner and restricting the purchases of entertainment, like toys or gaming consoles. As kids, my sister and I did not have an easy time adjusting to the new lifestyle since ways to entertain ourselves were very limited. However, this also forced us to think creatively and to utilize whatever resource we had. During the those years that I lived in the garage, my favorite way to pass the time was to construct buildings and other objects using leftover materials around the home. Before my parents disposed of the cardboard boxes, I would ask them if it would be okay to store the ones I pick for future projects. After agreeing on a set number of boxes I can take, I began to pick the cardboard boxes that will eventually be dismantled to become the parts for my finished structure. The parts, which had the possibility of becoming the wall of a fort or a door to a car, became a way to express my imagination without sacrificing money. Constructing objects and structures from cardboard boxes has not only fostered my tendency to think creatively due to the sheer number of designs and blueprints but has also improved my observational and analytical skills by constantly challenging myself to think what pieces will become the perfect fit.
Besides constructing forts and building cars out of cardboard boxes, I also had another activity I did in my spare time that granted me a small amount of freedom while I lived within the tiny garage my family called home. I always walked around the neighborhood and played with my childhood friends games that we collectively created. Seconds after meeting would become minutes of thinking what game to play which then turned into hours of the group having fun and laughing. However, hanging out with friends was not the only reason why I desired to go outside; I also enjoyed the open space since it allowed my mind to creatively think of limitless possibilities that I may be able to answer one day. Throughout those limitless possibilities, there was one question that always occurred to me. Can I send something that can reach the clouds? As I grew up, I realized that my childhood self wanted to see what it was like to reach the sky and see what was beyond the things only visible to the naked eye. The question became a goal for which I continue to strive for, to this day. In the end, my decision to major in aeronautical engineering stems from my childhood desire to see what the sky is like and my willingness to persevere to find the answer. Working in the field would provide valuable information while teaching me the fundamentals and key strategies that I can utilize for future projects. The knowledge and experience I gain can become my cardboard pieces to a future aircraft. Furthermore, being accepted to a prestigious college would represent an achievement for the entire family since that would mean the struggles we faced earlier in our lives has started to pay dividends. It would be a step in the right direction towards the American Dream that we are close to grasping. The dream that my father has sought out for so long would soon become a reality.