My grandpa died.

But that's not all.

The company husbandy works for is being audited and so he hasn't been paid in over 2 months. I'm a SAHM since it was financially smarter for me to stay home than to stay with my job and pay more than I was earning for child care. We were on one income but now that's gone. We finally spent the last of our savings. I had to choose between toilet paper and diapers last week. Thank god for his parents who lent us enough for groceries this week and mine who are paying our electric bill this month. But I have no idea how we're going to pay rent. I've put in over 100 applications since husbandy stopped getting paid but so far only landed a very part time (5 hr/wk) job that I can do with Squeaky. Husbandy is still in school 2 days/week and he is rocking that (yay!) but hasn't gotten call backs for any other job either.

So there's all this stress and then my mom calls me and tells me that my grandpa died. I'm one of 3 of his 40+ grand kids that still visited him in the nursing home. I live 2000 miles away now but I made sure every time I was home to make a point of it to see him. And now I can't even afford to be at his funeral on Thursday. My husband never even got to meet him. But thank God Squeaky did (even though Grandpa wasn't really there enough to know that he was holding his first and only great-grandchild). I cried on husbandy's shoulder tonight. That never happens. I'm the strong one. I don't cry. But it couldn't be helped;I'm at my breaking point.

I've heard bad things happen in 3s so now I'm just waiting for the final shoe to drop.

Sorry for the rambling and poor flow. Thanks for letting me get all that out.