Living Genderfluid when you're non-passing?

Recently I've been trying to make some big changes in my life as I've been very unsatisfied with my existence (have been for quite some time, but that's a different story all together). One of the biggest things I keep coming back to is how I'm not comfortable with who I am, physically. I often find myself thinking "holy shit, I'm a real person, this is what I look like, I had no idea!" and am constantly surprised that I never look how I feel and it often is very both distressing and disorientating. To give you a bit of an idea, I've got the build of Jared Leto meets Christian Bale, but often feel more along the lines of a Ruby Rose. I find myself feeling less and less masculine everyday and more androgynous or feminine, often fluctuating between the two; although rarely I still do feel masculine and am at least comfortable in my body when I feel that way.

I've heavily thought about transitioning as I just feel I would be so much happier and more comfortable with both who I am physically and as a person, but at the same time I'm absolutely terrified of both commitment and somehow just fucking it up. I know for those days I do feel Masculine, if I were to transition MtF, it would be so much easier to look more on the masculine side of androgyny (if that makes sense?) and would still feel rather satisfied with myself.

I know this is a rather silly question to ask since it's about personal feelings, but, would that be a decent thing to do? Or is there an easier way to simply get by? I can't see myself being comfortable in feminine clothing without looking the part, and I certainly don't look anywhere near the part. I can see myself being comfortable in masculine clothing, even if I were to look feminine myself. Has anyone else here dealt with something similar? I don't want to make such a permanent change in my life like transitioning, but at the same time I feel like it might be the only way for me to actually feel comfortable. Would anyone have any suggestions for how I would deal with these feelings and such?

Forgive me if this isn't in the right subreddit, I don't know where else I would put it other than r/asktransgender but it didn't seem like it would quite fit in.