My [27 F] boyfriend [36 M] of 1.5 years has herpes. He knew, and didn't tell me.

My boyfriend and I have been dating for 1.5 years. We've talked about kids, marriage, everything and it seemed like we were totally in sync about every aspect. I thought he was the one. We moved in together and have been living together for a year, and just renewed the lease for another. Great? Great!

Until.. SURPRISE! I found out he has herpes, and has had herpes for years. He left a piece of paper from his doctor laying around and I happened to come across it. He says he didn't tell me because he never had an outbreak after the first one. Another excuse was "How do you tell somebody that? It's not something you just blurt out."

Awesome. Thanks.

I tried to get tested, but the clinic said they try to discourage the blood test if I'm asymptomatic, which I am. He apologized. Said he should have told me. And he said he would have brought it up if/when he had an outbreak. Blindsided. Totally blindsided. We had lots of unprotected sex. He didn't like using condoms. And he did not take Valtrex.

He didn't respect me enough to tell me. He took away my choice.

I haven't broken up with him, but I feel like I need to. I love him. And I need an outside opinion. I can't go to friends/family with this. I'm a total mess.

Help me, reddit.

TL;DR - Boyfriend had herpes, I found out after 1.5 years of mostly unprotected sex. What do I do now?