I never particularly liked blow

But it made you like me

So in spite of the canary in my head

Chirping at me, ‘just say

No, thank you’ or

‘I have a headache’

I found myself every weekend

in a horseshoe of your friends,

fogging your glass coffee table,

Swathed in the electric light

And the throbbing inanity of

Disclosure record I bought you.

The high coke gives is subtle,

Pricy, and largely pointless.

There’s an energy, a cold

Euphoria with the uncanny ability

To set the controls to autopilot.

But what’s the point of doing

Something that can lift mountain ranges

If its guaranteed to crash back down to earth?

You were always better at cutting lines than me.

I still do it sometimes, it makes

Me feel like you’re still in the car with me,

Before I walk into my friend’s parties.

I get it online so nobody knows about it.

I wear the jacket you bought me,

With the one red button on the lapel

That you said was like a bindi

To show the other girls that I’m taken.

At AA meetings, they want you to

Submit to a force

More powerful than yourself.

I say that’s stupid, because

That’s exactly what lands a person

In the basement of an episcopal church

On a perfectly good Friday night

In the first goddamned place.

But how do you explain to a room

Full of rational people that it’s not me

But a ghost who’s doing this? I shouldn’t be

Here, but I wish you were.

// https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/3rdown/black_dog/cwoun97 https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/3riljv/changing/cwouhtp