I'm struggling to be excited for life.

Whenever I think about what I'm going to do, I think "what next?". It seems like life is just a continuous loop of "what now?". I'm not feeling particularly suicidal at the moment but I'm just failing to be excited for life.

Whenever I think about this, I get this sinking feeling in my chest. I feel like everything is just pointless and I can't do anything about it.

I think this might have stemmed from my ecstasy use. When I took ecstasy the come up, the peak and the plateau of the trip felt so amazing and I just wanted it to be forever. But all things come to an eventual end. When this thought crept into my mind while tripping it would ruin my high. I felt so crap on the come down and maybe the negative thoughts stuck with me.

How do I deal with these feelings and thoughts? I don't want this to come up when I'm in a bad state.