The Flex Contract

Brothers and Sisters.

It has come to my attention that the common non-lifters (who have not accepted Broden as their Swolley savior) , are not aware of our legal and sacred contract.

I was at work today, finishing up my daily tasks and as the hour of lunch began, I lifted up my arm and hit a single arm bicep salute to honor Broden. My coworker had the audacity of asking why I flex so much.

And then it hit me, these people are not aware we as members of the Church of Iron of Latter Day Gains, are obligation to flex and hit a pose on the hour, every hour to hit our daily quota or when good news is heard. I explained to him the longer your a church member, the more daily devotional flexes you must donate, (For example, those lifting more than 5 years much flex twice an hour, newbies at least one double bicep a day and etc) but he looked at me baffled.

We must raise awareness, we have the first amendment right here in America to practice our faith freely. We should not be ashamed for our devotion to thy God of Gains. Any one else run into this issue while practicing their faith?