[Update] Surprise! N-Mom is using my brother's death for her own personal gain

So, to absolutely nobody's surprise, my mother has been using my brother's unexpected and tragic death to further her own crazy schemes. She's constantly posting on his Facebook page, annoying his friends by constantly commenting about my brother on every post they make, making everybody feel like they can't talk about my brother because every time they do, she co-opts the post and makes it all about her. She's literally using him to get attention and keep the spotlight. It's despicable.

My dad cried all day yesterday because of it. They've been divorced for 15 years but she still blames him for everything. It's ridiculous.

Last night, though, she posted a picture of my brother holding a baby and said "[Brother] was always a natural with babies. I looked forward to someday having grandkids. Now I know he is in heaven holding babies [too] precious for Earth. 💖"

REALLY, MOTHER. YOU "LOOKED FORWARD TO SOMEDAY HAVING GRANDKIDS". REALLY.

She said that knowing full well that my fiancee and I are planning on trying to get pregnant and start a family this year. She KNOWS I'm having kids no matter what it takes, especially now. She KNOWS it.

What, is it because we're lesbians? Our kids don't count because we have to use a sperm donor? Our kids don't count because we might have to adopt them? Our kids don't count because you don't like me? Because I'm over your crap and I don't let you manipulate me?

My fiancee and I decided to push up our wedding to this month, to forgo the big party we wanted, to make sure my sick father would be able to be there. I've lost sleep wondering if not telling my mother about it was the right decision, if not inviting her to my wedding was really the right thing to do. I know now that it is absolutely the right decision. I do not want her there, or any of her family. I'm tired of this crap. I really, truly never want to talk to her again.

I've got a family to think about. I have other people I need to protect. I will not expose my future children to her. I am NOT dealing with this crap any longer.