100 Days of Hell

I'm fourteen and a half years old. I'm constantly tired and worn down. My periods suck.

The first period I got was about 7-10 days long. That was almost two years ago. My periods since then have been hell.

They began, each month, to increase in length or bleeding. Eventually, that August (about 5 months after getting period for first time that March), my period started. This time, it didn't end.

My period lasted 104 days of bleeding until we stopped it with Nuva Ring, a form of birth control, that following December. My friends were there the whole time, and I told them everything about it, except for the birth control (that is NOT something you want floating around school in Eighth grade). We used birth control for about four months, and despite the horrible side effects, it worked pretty well. My periods regulated with the Nuva Ring pretty well, other than having them super super heavy (super plus tampons every bleeding day). We ended up stopping the ring in May because the side effects were creating mood swings and sharp pains in my head and body.

My period stopped all together for about three months (over that summer).

In September/October, I got my period again (its normal for periods to take a while to come back after using birth control). It lasted about 15 days.

I about a month later, I traveled to New York with my mom and sister. I had the time of my life, despite feeling sick in my stomach and being terribly backed up (constipation) for the whole trip. I got my period on one of the last days of the trip.

It hasn't stopped since. Today is day 91 of nonstop bleeding. I haven't told my friends about it, they think its regulated. My mom isn't very supportive. I have no one to talk to about it anymore. My friends just don't understand. I went to doctors last time I had the 100 day period, got blood tests, ultra sounds, urine tests, and scans. None of which diagnosed me with anything.

My periods now are so heavy. I used Ultra tampons, and if there were more absorbent ones to use, I would use those.

Last year, while I was on the Nuva Ring, I told myself "This is going to fix everything. A year from now, you'll have it all figured out. It'll finally be regulated."

Now, as I am sitting here typing this, I know that this isn't going to go away. My mom doesn't want to use any medications, such as an IUD, that might risk my chance of having kids later on in life. Neither do I.

In January (a month ago) I was so sad. Just SAD. I couldn't understand why this was happening to me. Why, why can't they diagnose me? Why wont my mom bring me to the doctor? Hell, why isn't she trying harder to FIX me?! I have always been so so happy. But last month, I wanted to cut. I wanted to stab myself in the uterus just to punish my body for not fixing itself and for putting me through this pain. It's hard being a freshman in Highschool and dealing with a heavy period every damn day and never getting a break.

But I didn't want to die. And I didn't want to be hurt. And I didn't want scars.

I got better. I stopped crying.

Now, I'm falling deep into that again, as I reach day 100 all over again, as I told myself over a year ago I would never need to do.

I don't have a social life outside of school, although I have many friends. I can't go anywhere with my heavy periods (needing to change Ultra tampon every 2 hrs). I'm afraid they'll get suspicious and start asking questions about it. I've already been excluded from their parties.

I want it to be over, and it isn't .

I'm so damn tired and I always feel sick and I cant DEAL with this anymore.

What's my diagnosis, Doctors?

Please, fix me.