He's carrying Thor's hammer in his pants and I'm just a human

All right, bros, here's the situation. Last November, I met a guy in a club. He had blue eyes, an accent and nice scruff on his face, so of course we ended up at the place he was staying later in the night. We made out and then his underwear came off and holy shit. Let me paint you a mental picture about this guy's package:

His manhood was so massive, it affected the tidal waves in the sea.

His rod was so colossal it needed its own seat in a movie theater

His schlong was so spacious the guy needed to visit the emergency room multiple times due to lumberjacks confusing it for a log.

What I'm trying to say is that this guy had a very big penis. Well, we advanced into the bed and amazing times were had, but nobody really penetrated anyone's behind. I was, and still am, a proud (very proud, because it's totally by choice, shut up) virgin. And then it was the morning, I had to go home and the guy had to catch the plane back home.

Anyway, we traded Skype, stayed in touch and the guy turned out to be really nice and trustworthy. We talked and then he said one day that he would visit my country again. Then we talked more and we both agreed that we would like to advance further in bed. So, yeah.

I only have a couple weeks to prepare for that monster. I don't have much experience down there, not even with fingers or anything, and this guy's thing is not something for a beginner. But he's a really compassionate lover, responsible about safety in sex and generally someone ideal to lose a virginity to - except for the bastard child of a flagpole and a bologna that he calls a dick. So, what are your tips to help me survive in health? BTW, I understand that it would probably find help in sex toys but, unfortunately those are out of a question, because they are super expensive (at least where I live) and I'm super broke.