Rationalization

I've been struggling with my thoughts for about a year and a half now. 20, F here. I broke up with my (now ex) girlfriend around a year and a half ago, because I wanted to try dating guys, and also thought there was no future to us (because none of us wanted to come out).

There's this logical side of me which knows I'm not strong enough to come out and push for same-sex marriage, I don't think my family's accepting enough. Hell, I'm not accepting enough.

And yet, there's the romantic side of me which tears up at the thought of us not being able to get that forever we dreamed of. It breaks my heart.

What do I do? I am over her in the sense that I don't speak to her daily, I don't need her, I'm quite content with my life. Yet, she's in my life, and I know I love her. Once in every 2-3 days I spend considerable amount of time feeling, well, sad. How do I just snap out of it? How do I stop thinking of what could be?