Struggling to make it day by day

My divorce ended at the beginning of November 2014 which was 2 weeks before our 3rd wedding anniversary. We had our problems sure, but I did everything for my wife. Looking back I know I made some mistakes making a few comments that hurt my wives feelings.

We separated for a year to give each other some space to figure things out. During this time I was working to better myself, learning to appreciate her and everything she did for our family and she was working on a new relationship with someone else. 3 months after our divorce finalized she was re-engaged and married 2 months later.

Two years later I struggle every day. Despite the fact she cheated on me, I was willing and able to forgive her if we worked on our marriage. She was unwilling to do so. Waking up everyday I struggle to make it to work. My anxiety and depression has excelled my stomach problems to a point of missing 1-2 days of work a week. I can't get this girl out of my mind.. Even though she's nowhere near the person now as she was when we married.

I don't know what it's going to take to get through this. I wake up and wonder who would miss if I was gone. My immediate answer is probably just my immediate family. I have very few "friends" which are actually just acquaintances in my mind. I spend my time alone in the confines of my home. I rarely make it outside because I see no need to interact because I'm scared of being letdown by people because people are unpredictable. The loneliness is unbearable at this point in my life. Having to completely start over at the age of 35 is sickening.

I've tried several different medications and anti-depressants.. Cymbalta, Lexapro/Wellbutrin, Effexor, Prozac.. None of them seemed to do anything for me except make me numb and a zombie to the world. I'm currently on Xanax 1mg 2x a day for my anxiety. I have no idea what it's going to take to move on in my life and the motivation simply isn't there.