Things weren't that bad, but I can't let go of the past

I've seen a lot of horror stories here on RBN, and mine is not one of them. Still, I can't stop thinking obsessively about stuff that happened 20 years ago. To the extent that these thoughts develop into thoughts of self harm, etc. Anyone have any advice about moving on?

Anyway, here's my (rather self-pitying) story. My parents were probably not Ns, even though they were a bit self absorbed. From what little I remember of my early childhood, I had a lot of problems with being bullied both at home and at school. My biggest persecutor was one of my brothers, who's 3 years older than me. I remember him hitting me, holding me down, putting a pillow on my face and sitting on it, locking me into bathrooms and closets, constantly belittling me, etc. The physical stuff stopped at some stage, but the verbal bullying continued until he was in his twenties.

Probably the most traumatic experience I had, though, was being sent away to boarding school at 13. My parents justified this partly from practical reasons, and partly by saying that as a sensitive and shy child I needed to be toughened up. They did say that if I didn't like it, I could come home. When I did beg to come home a few months later it became a bit of a family joke (references to Allan Sherman, etc.) and of course nothing happened. 5 fun years of homophobic bullying ensued, and I never really trusted my parents again.

Here's the thing, though. I'm still in touch with my brother and father, and they seem like fairly decent people. (My mother died some time ago). I've never spoken to them about how I feel about the past. We're not the kind of family that talks about emotions. I don't know if I should say anything, or just deal with it myself. I'd feel kind of stupid bringing it up after all these years -- frankly I feel kind of stupid thinking about this stuff at all.

Any suggestions?