Why do I do this?

I've been bulimic for about ten years. Started seeing a counselor in December. I always thought my bulimia was set off by panic of potential weight gain. Now realizing that like any other addiction, I use the binge to escape uncomfortable emotions and fill some sort of hole. I want to recover. I want to be well. The counseling is uncomfortable but probably necessary. Thanks for reading. Even writing about this anonymously is strange and new.