Man, I hate Devils fans.

I saw a Devils fan yesterday and I just lost it. Fucking smug prick. I was eating an outside lunch at this nice little restaurant, and he was sitting eating some fucking salad. Salad. Typical fucking Devils fan. He was there with his stupid Devils fan wife who of course was eating a fucking salad too.

I could tell he thought he was part of the best fans in hockey. He didn't say anything, but the way that stupid prick was chewing. Jesus Christ. He had a fucking Devils t-shirt on. I bet you he bought it at the team store like a fucking schmuck. He and the fucking stupid cashier probably had this big self-satisfactory exchange. "I'd like to buy this best t-shirt in hockey with the best money in hockey please." I couldn't fucking believe this asshole. He just kept going at this fucking salad like he's king of the world.

I just tried to ignore that attention seeking asshat but he just kept at it. Every time I looked away he'd conveniently grab for his hot ice or some fucking passive aggressive bullshit so that it would draw my eyes to him. LOOK AT ME LOOK AT ME BEST FAN IN HOCKEY RIGHT HERE. Jesus.

You should have seen his wife. What a bitch. The waitress came by to ask them how their food was and she relayed how fucking satisfied she was in the most smug way possible. This fucking fake-politeness Devils fans put on is ridiculous.

Next thing I know that guy pulls out his phone and starts texting. Are you fucking shitting me? I bet he just had to text his stupid friend all about his fucking salad was almost as good as being in hockey heaven.

I couldn't fucking take it. I told that fucking idiot what a smug fucking idiot he was. He was like "dude what are you talking about" like he didn't fucking know what a prick he was. I fucking tackled him right there. Staff called the cops on me as if I did anything wrong. They are actually going to fucking put me on trial for assault. Fucking Devils fans.