And the walls come tumbling down

Excuse this as I'm writing this to try and keep from crying out of frustration with myself and everything else. EVERYTHING that I expect to be exciting and encouraging always manages to go so fucking south. THE ONE THING I HAD going for me when I was younger was that I did well in school without much effort. I am not that girl anymore; I just spent 7 long goddamn fucking years working and going to school to finish JUST my core classes. FINALLY made it to the point where I'm ready to transfer and feel excited. Here I am(like some fucking fool) thinking I had a year maybe a year and a half before I get my fucking bachelors degree. NOPE, make that 3 years and 3x more expensive than I anticipated. Words can not describe how utterly pathetic and worthless I feel. I had little to no motivation to keep this up before and now it seems laughable. I have a test tomorrow that I can't even finish the review for cause I feel like I'm about to have a breakdown. All I can think about is where to cut to keep it private yet still feel satisfying. Can I have something, something about myself to be proud of or love?????