I slept with my ex-husband last night.

My ex and I got a divorce three years ago because I didn't want children. It was an irreconcilable difference. We loved each other very much, but I just couldn't give him what he actually wanted.

Let me be clear: he is the love of my life, I stand firm on that. The last night we spent together in our house--the day after the divorce was finalized--we slept together. He told me he would love me forever. I said the same thing. He moved away. We didn't speak until last week.

I ran into him at the shopping mall in town. He was buying presents for his nephews. He looked just as sexy and amazing as before, I almost didn't recognize him. He told me he moved out of state, got a job, but decided to move back. We went and got dinner. It was like the last three years hadn't even happened.

Halfway through dinner, I found myself holding his hand. He was using his thumb to stroke my hand. It was so intimate. When the check came, he had tears in his eyes. I asked him if he was okay, and he told me that he loved me. I didn't say it back, but we went to his apartment and had sex. Multiple times. All night.

I love him. I still love him. I want to be with him, but I can't give him what he wants. But we're getting dinner tomorrow. We're going to talk. I feel awkward, but I want to know if there is a future for us after all.