Did anybody think they would never have kids (especially asking those who have had abortions) [SFW]

Hi all!

I'll start off by saying that I am a college student who is observing this subreddit for a class project, HOWEVER this question is 100% based on real life experience and actual curiosity. I would really appreciate any advice or anecdotes; they'll be reflected on extra thoroughly since that's required for the class lol

Onto the question: I got pregnant last December intentionally, with my (now ex) fiancee...the day I found out I was pregnant was one of the happiest in my life, but because things fell through in the relationship, I felt like I had to terminate the pregnancy (I wasn't prepared to be a mom alone...prolly should have thought about that before getting pregnant, I know). Now, seeing babies or children kind of makes me cringe and I can't imagine ever being pregnant again or being a mom at all. So I guess my question is if anyone can relate to that and how it affects your position as a parent now (if at all)...and just in general how past decisions play into how you parent or how you see your children. And if you didn't want children, what made you change your mind?