mystery illnesses fucking up my life

I'm always out of energy, I'm running behind on homework with only a month of high school left, and I have no motivation to change. I always feel like I have a new disease but I'm too scared to go into the doctor because I think she thinks I'm just looking for attention.

I can't tell if my lack of energy is due to CFS or some sort of resurfacing depression, but it is ruining my life. I've slept through too many classes over the past few weeks and my school will fail me if I continue to do so. I've worked so hard to get to where I am, at a "prestigious" high school, yet I'm setting myself up for failure. I don't have the motivation to apply for scholarships and my college tuition is going to be over 30k next year. I have no idea how I'm going to get enough loan money and I feel like I should've been able to get many good scholarships. I'm always thirsty and I wonder if I have diabetes, I get random sharp chest pains, I become crippled at random times, sometimes I can't physically talk, and I just don't know what the fuck is wrong with me. Is my body trying to make me sick for no reason? Is my mind trying to make me sick?? I feel like I have a plethora of mental disorders too. yet I can't bring myself to see a psychiatrist. they all think I'm looking for attention and try to get me on meds before I can blink. I hide my mental disorders as much as I can because I don't want people to think I'm looking for attention, and it's just plain embarrassing. I truly believe I'm possessed by a demon despite knowing it's logically implausible.

I feel like I'm set up to have a great life, but I'm just fucking it all up. I used to be smart, talented, and self-motivated, but now all I do is nap when I have the chance and put off work until I notice my grade slipping below a C-.

I'm fucking my life up, and all I can do is watch.