How did you convince yourself to ask for help?

Hi everybody, I am really having trouble convincing myself to ask for help from my doctor. Every time I begin to feel a little bit better, I look back on my dark points and think that I'm really going to make it through this time, that it wasn't that bad, etc. etc. For some context, which I mostly just want to share with someone, I can remember the onset of my depression at age 12. I have a great family, had a great childhood, but depression and (I suspect) bipolar disorder are extremely common on both sides of my family, especially in the women. In fact, on my father's side of the family, every single woman has been diagnosed with some sort of mental illness. My cousin tried to kill herself as well as my aunt. Despite all of this there is an enormous stigma against taking medication. Any of my family members who were taking antidepressants or meds eventually stopped. I guess the narrative is either that depression is the result of some sort of narcissm or that it's just a part of the family "personality". I am still on my parents insurance (I am 22) and worry that if they found out I was on meds they would be disappointed in me. Within the last 2 years the "episodes" of depression have occurred more frequently and I think about (not plan) suicide more often and even more frequently I imagine getting sick and dying, getting in an accident, etc. I know it is time to do something especially since my grades have suffered enormously because I can barely get out of bed. How did you get past all of your hang ups and get yourself to the doctor to ask for help?