Me [30 F] with my FWB [26 M] 1+ year, Confused as to what he wants & what his texts mean

I'll try to keep the backstory as short as I can. For the main question, you can skip down to the part that says "Timeline" and/or just read the texts (formatted as quotes).

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I'm married, and it's been an open-relationship for about 12 years, but my partners were always more hookups or play partners, never anything where there was romance or serious feelings between us.

About a year ago, I started talking to a guy, mostly just texting or talking on the pone to kill time. We really clicked and I fell for him hard. It's turned into kind of a long-distance FWB thing - we text constantly, talk on occasion, and hookup when schedules and money allows one of us to make the drive.

He recently got divorced and has been clear from the start that he's not looking for a serious relationship. My husband and I are probably headed for a divorce, n part because he was very threatened by the feelings I have for this guy, in part because 2 of his last 3 girlfriends wanted monogamy and he seems eager to get rid of me in favor of someone whose sexual kinks match his better (we've both got out share of blame, but we are in a pretty unhealthy marriage and have been for a while).

The part that has me confused is the most recent texts from FWB. He's been hesitant about getting together, and I know part is because he's worried about my husband freaking out - last time we met hubby was with me and suggested I stop by and see him and then later on wigged out over it.

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Timeline:

About a month ago - Meet up and hang out a while. Kiss, etc. He walks around with me holding me hand out holding me almost the entire time. I was stressed, not sure if I would see him again, told him I loved him (mostly was stressed and wanted him to know in case something happened to me). He said "I love you" back (I don't really put much stock in "I love you too"s though). Could tell he wanted me to stay, he was pleading with me to find out a way to stay longer or overnight, looked like he was starting to tear up when we left, which was strange.

We've texted in between. He knows I have feelings, cares about me, but I think he finds the whole situation amusing more than anything else.

Our relationship is and always has been more focused on sexual exploits, flirting, and friendship than on stereotypical romance stuff.

2 weeks ago - keeps txting it'd be great to see me. I have an interview about midway between my city & his, offer to meet up afterwards, but he's busy. This is probably true, but it seems like stuff comes up a lot.

Friday/Saturday - I tell him I might come down, he seems excited and happy about it, but then my husband acts weird when I ask him (turns out he had plans to see his girlfriend & some other girl, and counts on me as a babysitter). Then he tells me he feels weird about it, not to come if it'll cause problems. I ask him to be honest, and let me know why stuff always comes up.

He says it is mostly because he doesn't want it to cause problems with me or drama with my husband, and I tell him I'll pretty much catch hell either way, so not to worry about that.

Then he's back to being cool, asking when I'll be there how long I can stay, etc. I tell him just for the day, maybe overnight, but I have to check with my husband first. Husband makes a big deal about it, I end up not going because FWB feels like it'll get turned into some sort of trap or a set up for more drama if I do.

Some of our texts (his in quotes, mine in Italics):

Should I just give up then? I feel like most the time you wanna flirt, but not actually get together anymore.

I really hate being caught in the middle. It would have been different if it was like last year and y'all were on good terms.

And I don't want you thinking that we're gonna be together and get married one day.

I wish you could leave to come here earlier. (Why?) So I can see you more.

Is (your husband) actually trying with the whole marriage thing?

No. He's already planned on filing, paying a lawyer, and has at least 2 other girls. He told me he's been done with the marriage since last November.

If it's gonna be a big hassle don't worry about it. I don't wanna cause more drama.

Sorry, I wish things were how they were when we first met.

Just wait. It's a trap or he's just gonna use it against you. Don't give him anything else.

I'm sorry. I hate how awkward the whole situation is now.

I start doing housework and other stuff, don't really text FWB much and notice he's not on his phone checking his messages anyway, so I assume he's gone out and found something to do.

Saturday night - Pretty sure I'm getting drunk texted.
It's ok baby, sweetie, lots of Muahh (kissy texts), etc

Instead of jumping into sexting, which I figure it was gonna be, he starts talking about how bad he wants to kiss me and how he wants me.

He texts me "I want you now I want you here I want you forever"

I just text back "don't",

because after telling me he doesn't want a relationship I have no freakin' clue what that means, and don't want to hear it if it doesn't apply sober.

Today's just been a couple "hey" and "what's up" type texts. Like it's awkward, we both know it, and neither is going to go bring anything else up.

I'm just wondering if I'm reading too much into stuff, or if there's some reason he's texting about not wanting to get married and then following it up with "I want you forever" a couple hours later.

Yes, I have feeling for him and I'm cool with him not feeling the same way about me, but this kinda stuff just throws me for a loop.

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tl;dr: FWB randomly tells me not to ever think we'll be together and getting married, then a few hours later drunk texts me how he wants me forever. I'm confused.