Trip Report: 17mg 4-AcO-DMT

I took ~17mg of 4-AcO-DMT at 9:00pm on 5/28/16. Setting was my bedroom.

The effects of this substance seem to take hold exactly one hour after ingestion. Between 9-10, I was laying in my bed watching Planet Earth on my tablet. As 9:45 rolled around, I became somewhat uneasy and a slight amount of aniety and dread filled me as I felt the effects creeping up from all sides. The second time on this substance, I had forgotten exactly what to expect. But once 10pm hit, I couldn’t watch Planet Earth anymore. The screen was too bright, David Attenborough sounded distorted and hurt my ears, and I became weirded out by the animals killing eachother. So I turned off my tablet, plugged my headphones into my phone, turned to “Classical Solo Piano” on Pandora, and held my squishy pillows tight enough to keep me somewhat grounded in reality.

My eyes were closed nearly the whole time, as my room was dark and I did not want to look into the blackness. The first thing I did was told myself to breathe and be calm. That nothing was wrong with me, that I had only ingested a psychedelic. And then I began to think about what exactly the effects of a psychedelic are, why they are so hard to put my finger on. I allowed my mind to be free, shifting back and forth between my sensory inputs. My touch, taste, smell, vision, hearing were no more. I was simply a brain with all thoughts and ideas flowing through my core. I felt as though every fiber of my being was made up of more fibers, and I delve deeper and investigated those fibers, which held more fibers, and so on. I felt that everything was made up of pieces, smaller and smaller, and I travelled through all of them. It felt as though I was on a waterslide, shooting fast through the pieces that I’m made up of.

I tried to conceive of my being, to understand who and what I was, but I was moving too fast through the layers and layers of myself to catch on to any coherent thought. The only thing that kept ringing through my head: Connectedness. Everything is connected. I was simply experiencing the connections on the inside. I was sliding between my neurons, feeling every synapse as I was launched to another area of myself. It was around this time that I noticed I was sweating a lot. I had a fan on in my room, but it only felt right and safe to be mostly under my covers, gripping onto my pillow and what I thought was reality. I looked at my phone to check the time and skip to the next song. It was around 12:40.

Something that helped me hold on and actually saved me from absolutely being scared was the music. I listened to Bach, Debusse, Tchaikovsky, Mozart, Satie, Mendelssohn. I rode the waves of the notes. I could feel myself sliding up or down depending on which notes were being played, a marvelous show of colors popping into my head like fireworks. When I became anxious as I tried to grasp my mind around reality, I simply allowed myself to get lost in the music. I let it ring in every fiber of my being, and the fibers of those fibers as well.

The body high was something, let me tell you about that. I felt that I was being carried by millions of hands. Objects were touching me from every side, massaging my skin and muscles and bones. Every time I moved even slightly, I felt a warmth and vibration. I felt compelled to move often. It felt that I was getting cramps all over my body, and every time I moved and stretched, I could feel the cramping being replaced by euphoria. One negative side effect that persisted the whole time was jaw clenching. I clenched my teeth together so hard that I can still feel the ache 15 hours after I ingested the capsule. These went on until about 3:00. I was tossing and turning in my bed at random intervals the whole time, often feeling cramps of euphoria in my muscles as I moved. At around 3, I did remove my headphones for a bit because I could tell I was coming down, but I could not get up. I was glued to the bed and fell back. The darkness of my room was quickly flickering with light and color. Later, at around 3:40 I actually did get up to use the bathroom, and it felt very strange to walk. My bedroom felt huge and I felt small. The Buddha painting in my bathroom morphed as I stood next to it, urinating. I quickly returned to my room and I actually ingested 3 grams of Kratom because I could start to feel my jaw pain. I lay in bed again, listening to my music for another hour or so.

At around 4:30, I got up again to stretch and use the bathroom once more, and I could tell that the effects were receding. I was no longer travelling between the fibers of my conscious. My sensory input was returning. My body stopped cramping with euphoria. I decided to lay in bed and watch some American Dad because I was exhausted from the show within my mind, so I thought it might be a good idea to have an external show. I continued to do this until 6, when I took another 3g of Kratom. This dose made me feel tired, so I turned off Netflix and tried to sleep.

Conclusion: This was my second time with 4-AcO-DMT. I finally understand Psilocin, why it is so different from other drugs and why it is special. I could feel the activation of my 5-HT receptors, producing thought that was previously hidden from me. I felt the connection between everything. I understood that everything is made up of pieces and fragments, each smaller and more complex than the last. The best way I can visualize this: +>++>+++>++++>+++++>++++++. It is difficult to wrap this up simply and explain exactly what happened. I feel a sense of calm and exhaustion. I feel as though I dove head first into my mind and came out clean on the other side. It was an amazing experience, that’s all I can say. 4-AcO-DMT is something that I will not be using for a while. I don’t feel the need to.