I’m [20F] talking to a guy [20M] who “doesn’t want a relationship”
I’ve been talking to this guy that I met through Tinder at the beginning of the year (february). We didn’t talk much back then (once a week) but we decided to meet up after classes end (end of April), and we did. The date went absolutely amazing, I’ve never connected with someone as much as I did with him, and he said the same. No kiss or anything. We went on a second date shortly after, went great but he didn’t make a move. Later he confessed to me that he wanted to but “I was too awkward”, which is pretty much code for “I was too nervous”, I presume. We text everyday now.
A few days ago, he tells me that he’ll be home alone for a few weeks, and then invites me over to “have some fun”, which was totally shocking because we never even spoke of hooking up, I mean the guy hadn’t even kissed me yet. I thought this was going to be different. So I said something along the lines of “lol, I’d prefer it if you were direct with your intentions”, to which he responded that he wants to have sex with me.
Now I’m not sure if I totally fucked up and sounded insecure with this next part, but I pretty much told him I actually like him and enjoy his company, and I asked him if his intentions this entire time was to just use me for sex. His response? “I like you too, it’s not that I don’t. I’m just in a weird place, I don’t really want a relationship right now. I’ve been dating on and off for about a year, so it doesn’t end up well.” Then he asked me if I still wanted to come over. I said “Sure” (I mean, I want to have sex with him but ????), and the topic changed. Okay?
I hadn’t even mentioned anything about a relationship so idk why he said that. I don’t exactly want to be exclusive right at this moment or anything either (I’m talking to others). But I’m kind of done with the whole hook-up phase and I want something that may eventually lead to something. I have no idea what to make of his answer. Was that a massive red flag or a fuck up on my part?
tl;dr: guy I've been dating randomly told me he doesn't want a relationship and asked me for sex despite seeming very interested and genuinely liking me in person. should I move on?
Posted May 29, 2016, 7:39 PM UTC