I don't deserve to live

I am a terrible person with major depression who just can't take it anymore my girlfriend is mad at me her whole family hates me and nobody sees the progress that i made to fix myself that is what brings me down again. I'm pretty sure she's going leave me and I don't know how to live without her. My thoughts of suicide are starting to come back. I just need a shoulder to cry on. I'm giving up on my whole life. I can't do this anymore.