Early days yet, but I haven't given up.

I quit Monday. Made it two days, started binge eating, and ended up smoking half a cigarette. I figure I went from 20 a day for 12 years to none, I'm gonna have some difficulties. So, I get one a day for a few weeks. That was Tuesday.

Wednesday I was fine until I wasn't. Smoke or no smoke I spent about 4 hours crying hysterically. I guess that ticks the box for labile emotions. My day ended with swollen eyes and a bloody nose (you really can cry too hard).

I'm having trouble sleeping, even with anti-anxiety pills (which have done fuck-all for my emotional issues ATM). I'm nonstop twitchy.

On the upside, I have no idea what to do with my twitchy hands and coupled with the difficulty staying asleep, I have no excuse not to workout. Squats hurt. A lot. Did not know that. Wish I still didn't know that.

I ended up getting a vape. I need NRT, but there are no other types available to me (allergies or side effects). The upside to that is that my SO was a chemistry major and we make our own, so I was able to mix a 3mg that tastes good. I can't have the constant temptation of a half smoked cig around.

So far, I'm having some problems, but I haven't given up yet. I figure there have been enough new people in the last few weeks that I'd post about the crap emotional stuff so anyone else going through it knows they aren't alone.

(And if you found yourself laughing a little at my misfortune, it was intentional, you aren't going to hell. My sense of humor just makes more sense in person.)