A personal guide on how to recognize & handle psychosis. Signs and instructions.

I wrote this guide fully sober in case of emergency. It contains my personal signs of full blown psychosis (experienced twice over 1+ year use). I've been hospitalized and my use was exposed to my family. I do not want this to happen again. I do not trust anything I read when I'm in full blown psychosis. This guide also contains instructions in case it starts to appear again in my future use. I am keeping this on my phone and computer for quick access.

#Signs

1- Saying to yourself over and over again "this is not psychosis". Compulsive redosing and refusal to sleep. Thinking that if you sleep you will lose this cosmic revelation of truth. Stop. Nothing good will come from continuing the chase.

2- You will start hallucinating things that aren't there. Things look different when you are in psychosis. Cracks in sanity and gaps in your psyche will float to the surface. Things looking like pipes, faces, crystals, mist, shapes and letters will appear faintly written in dirt or wood and ceramic patterns. These are hallucinations.

3- Thinking someone is changing your arrangement of items or stealing from you. You can't explain how they are "doing it" when you've been there the entire time. You will start questioning your sanity and assume they are doing it telepathically or using psychic powers. This is irrational and bizarre.

4- Delusions of reference, cognitive bias and skepticism of any opposing rationale. Coincidences will seem to multiply and enforce each other, no explaination will satisfy you. You will be certain that all of this carries personal significance. Don't forget that this is imaginary.

5- Thinking everything is code for something else. You will start thinking that there is a massive system or individuals trying to convey meaningful messages to you. This will start appearing in numbers, TV, random texts, music lyrics, colours, and item positioning. For example: you have a tendancy to think there is someone trying to deliver something to you ONLY IF you follow the coded messages correctly. You will start following random "clues" and you never will find anything. In fact: there are none.

6- Thinking someone is spying on you. Plain and simple. You will start thinking there is some individual or group actively and routinely watching your every step and reading your train of thought. You might think they are trying to train you to read the code and lead you to something (nothing), then frustrate you if you fail. You are in fact in full blown psychosis and only frustrating yourself.

7- Destructive/aggressive behaviour that will pile on and on. You will start taking things apart and break them looking for something that isn't there. You will start randomly collecting items and sneaking around looking for more clues. This is nonsensical psychotic behaviour. You will be in danger of exposing yourself.

#What To Do?

1- Stop Redosing and don't panic. Take an anti-psychotic (Seroquel is king), or any anxiolytics/sedatives available. GBL, benzodiazepines, gabapentin, phenibut, anti-oxidants, Vitamin C, melatonin, diphenhydramine, B Complex, water and cigarettes (you probably haven't had one for a while). Anything that works but don't over do it.

2-Don't lose your three life-lines. Your wallet, keys and phone. If you've already lost them, you've gone too far. Keep your stash hidden and don't worry about it for today. Try to find what you lost tomorrow and don't make a mess.

3- Eat, eat & then eat. A human body cannot go into sleep mode on an empty stomach. Force yourself to eat and you will not regret any of it.

4- Calm down until you can sleep. Distract yourself with music, dancing, sex and porn, creative projects (you tend to get quite creative when borderline psychotic). Let go of that heavy mind.

5- Take a break for a while. Your stash will always be there for you, you will enjoy it more, focus on finding your life-lines if you've lost them, clean up any mess you made discretely (there shouldn't be any). Live to fight another day.