Question about problems with co-dependents/spouses when sober

I know how much drinking can affect those around you. After many AA meeting and discussions with other alcoholics, I have also come to understand us actually quitting drinking can be a huge problem for both parties. I am a different person - the real me - and most of all the idea that they could blame issues on my drinking just cannot be used any more. The power levels change.

Here is my question to others for my own benefit, though all discussion on the matter is very relevant and welcome from my side; has anyone experienced finding things about their spouse - or other close people to you - that truly bother you now, that didn't necessarily before? There were things that didn't bother me at all before, because either i didn't notice, or I equated them with other 'mistakes' I had made in the past before we were together. I'm talking spouse's sexual history, small hygiene things like not brushing her teeth because she is too comfortable in bed... Eating habits like chewing on crunchy stuff continually. From big to small things. From things in the past to current things.

Our relationship isn't toxic, but I take much more notice of some things now that I before 'forgot' by drinking. I met her while I was a drunk, and have known her much of the time as just that. But now it's a danger to my sobriety, and screws with my state of mind in general. I have worked a lot on understanding my egoism in my 4th step, but it's almost like I have begun to really feel too good for her.

Thanks all and God bless the sober and alcoholics out there trying to make themselves a better person.