My[17F, 18 next month] parents [31M, 42F] are psychologically abusive. Their newest method of control is wanting to install a surveillance camera in my bedroom. How do I deal with this?

I have reached the end of my rope with how to handle this situation, and was hoping maybe you guys could give me some insight or maybe your own life experiences to use as a guide.

A little background info: My mom and dad got divorced when I was 4yo and my brother Dylan was 2. Dad was kind of a deadbeat. Mom got remarried the following year to a man in the military, Pat, who is 11 years her junior. He has always had a drinking problem. They had a son together, James. He is now 11.

From the day they got married, Pat has insisted that I call him "dad", even though my biological dad is still an active part of my life. I didn't really understand at the time since I was so young, but I remember that he would punish me and Dylan whenever we would refer to him as Pat and to our dad as "Dad". This has continued ever since. He and my mom are still trying to force us to have relationships with him, even though we have expressed that we are not interested in the kind of relationship he wants. He refuses to accept that.

He has always been more harsh (to an EXTREME) with me and Dylan than he ever as been with James, going so far as to make Dyl do PT in the living room for not waking up early enough in the morning (by 6am) or his sneakers not being clean enough. This started when Dylan was ~6. He would scream and swear and get in our faces, posturing like he was going to hit us. He did hit us a few times, though Dylan received more of the physical abuse than I did. His favorite form of physical abuse, though, was to throw things at us, punch doors and walls, slam things around and break things. He probably justified it to himself, thinking that since he never PUNCHED US, that he wasn't abusing us. This terrified us as kids and we have always been afraid of what he might do, and afraid of setting him off. It takes almost NOTHING to send him into a drunken rage. He has since "apologized" for some of these things but will not acknowledge that this was physical abuse, and it WAS.

Anyway, aside from physical abuse, I was also on the receiving end of his emotional manipulation and psychological abuse. When I started puberty, he made a decree that I was only to wear t-shirts so as not to "expose myself" in his house. Even in the dead of summer, I was not allowed to wear a tank top to cool off. I even had to wear t-shirts to swim. He once came into my bedroom while I was laying down, wearing a tank top and reading a book, and screamed and yelled about what a trashy whore I was and how dare I expose myself to him. I was 14. He has, on more than one occasion, barged into my bedroom in the middle of the night in one of his drunken stupors to crawl into my bed to tell me how much he loves me and how he is going to change and blah blah blah.

My mom has always stood by Pat and supported all of this. Their excuses were always that we didn't understand marriage, that this is their house and they make the rules, if we didn't like it we could leave. They routinely gaslighted us, and Dylan and I have dealt with the psychological ramifications of their abuse for our whole lives. I have requested to see a therapist for my depression and anxiety several times, but my mom insists on taking me to a family therapist where she sits in on my appointments and discounts every word that I say, in Pat's defense of course. I have pretty much given up on going to therapy because she has made it impossible to do so in a healthy way.

I could go on and on ALL DAY about the terrible things Pat has done to us and then blamed us for, only to turn around and play the saint who took us in when we had no man to care for us. eye roll

Pat is currently overseas, and is constantly looking for new ways to keep tabs on us. His newest idea is to install surveillance cameras for "security" purposes. He sold my mom on the idea by telling her that without him there to protect us, that we are unsafe and he wants to be able to make sure we are OK at all times. She ate it up. He wants to install one in my bedroom, for safety but also to watch what I am doing. They are constantly accusing me of drinking or doing drugs, even though I have never done either one nor have I ever given them reason to suspect me of having used drugs or alcohol. I am a good student, have a decent job, and generally keep to myself. They are convinced otherwise.

Now, I am not comfortable with having a surveillance camera in my bedroom for obvious privacy reasons. I am also uncomfortable with Pat having access to the footage, since he has always been really fucking creepy and inappropriate with me. Crawling into bed with me like I mentioned earlier, forcing me to sit on his lap far past the appropriate age for that, the whole t-shirt thing.

How do I deal with this?? I turn 18 next month and I'm afraid that if I dig my heels in that they will just throw me out. Is there anything I can do at all? I feel so powerless and afraid of Pat, even though he is across the world. Is it worth fighting this? I am moving out next summer, but what can I do until then?? Any advice you guys might have for dealing with any of this would be so helpful, because I am just lost at this point.

TLDR; My stepfather is psychologically and physically abusive. My mother enables him and even enacts the abuse in his absence. They want to install a surveillance camera in my bedroom, and I am extremely uncomfortable with the idea. How do I proceed?