FHA appraisal pain in the ass

Nothing productive in this post, I just need to bitch/vent. I'm so fucking fed up with the FHA appraiser the buyers of my home are using. They ordered the appraisal July 22. Because of the back log in this market, even after paying a "rush" fee of something like $300, the best they could do was August 19th! That day finally comes around and the appraiser is nowhere to be found. My agent finally gets him on the phone around 2:00 (5 hours late) and he tells her he forgot. But now that it's so late on a Friday and he's tired, he's not going to come out. She bully's him into coming out on Sunday because he had agreed to have his shit turned in on that Monday. He was 4 hours late after trying to cancel again, but finally saw the house.

Monday, no word. Nothing Tuesday. Wednesday he turned stuff in but made mistakes and didn't turn all that was needed in. Heard Friday (last Friday) that we were only waiting on a little correction from him before underwriting can do their thing. Because this is FHA I've been worried about required repairs. It sounds like nothing is required, but I've still not heard for sure. Now that it's Monday, my agent just told me the appraiser didn't do what the lender needed from him, and is on vacation this week. We have already had to push back closing once (had 5 weeks originally) and are going to have to extend again.

The worst part is I'm buying my new home contingent on this one selling. That financing has been complete for weeks, just waiting on closing so I have equity for down payment. This douche bag is delaying 2 home sales because he can't do his job that he was paid a rush fee to do. I and the people we are buying from have already moved out of our homes (We are staying with the in laws) There are mortgage payments due that are unnecessary if we are selling the damn homes. This weekend is the only weekend I have off in September so I was really hoping to be able to get into my new home this week. Fuck. I want to put dog poop on this guys door step.