Dosage increases - internal battle

Today at work I had a really bad panic attack and my regular dosage schedule did not work. It was bad enough where I had to go to the bathroom and throw up that's how upset my stomache was. Lately the butterflies in my stomache from my intense anxiety has been killing me. I do have diclazepam on hand, but keeping it off limits to be used as a taper incase of an emergency pharmacy situation.

I'm on 3mg a day of ativan but it definitely is not enough. However, I don't want to dig a deeper hole in dependency on higher doses. On the other hand, I am miserable and not able to experience life with this anxiety. Sorry for all my ramblings on here, just dealing with some tough times at the moment :(