Firstly, if you're gonna put in a note at the beginning then you gotta find some way to differentiate it from the poem. Just do (this) or something. On to the poem. I like the consistent imagery a lot. I absolutely adore the last five lines of the poem, they really pull the whole thing together and give the poem a reason for that gritty, bone snapping sort of tone. I'll say that the rythym feels a bit unpolished. It's not bad for a first attempt but it feels a little non-commital. I like how it's sort of jagged like the content but it's not quite defined enough to complete the piece. Anyway, great stuff overall and I hope you keeping working with free verse.
Firstly, if you're gonna put in a note at the beginning then you gotta find some way to differentiate it from the poem. Just do (this) or something. On to the poem. I like the consistent imagery a lot. I absolutely adore the last five lines of the poem, they really pull the whole thing together and give the poem a reason for that gritty, bone snapping sort of tone. I'll say that the rythym feels a bit unpolished. It's not bad for a first attempt but it feels a little non-commital. I like how it's sort of jagged like the content but it's not quite defined enough to complete the piece. Anyway, great stuff overall and I hope you keeping working with free verse.