Lingerie
[removed]
Posted Oct 5, 2016, 1:55 AM UTC
07
I love the logical, yet symbolic truth of the concluding line, "Seduction of the world begins with the mind". Your poem seems to tell me to just, slow down, and make time for those we love and care about, although I don't think that's what you were trying to say.
I am curious though as to why you named it Lingerie. If you don't mind, could you explain it to me?
1
No I cannot. The beauty of poetry is the discovery of what it means to you. Unlike some I expect people to read my poems and find what about them is closest to them. That initial feeling you get is probably the best description of this. For instance you picked up on the symbolism of seduction, and you saw the exhortation to slow down and make time. Yet you feel you missed something which may suggest that you are unfamiliar with sultry.
1
Hello, friend!
We're happy you're here! We appreciate your poem and especially your willingness to participate in the Feedback Exchange Program. However, we have noticed that the feedback you've offered is below the minimum standards of effort that we've set out as part of the Exchange.
Notably, this particular post has been flagged as a low-effort critique.
What do I mean by "low effort critique"? Well, you can go here to read the whole wiki if you want, but I'll summarize it for you. Basically, we require that linked feedback be a bit more than "I like your poem" or "Your poem sux lol". Feedback should benefit both you and the author by making an attempt to say why you liked or did not like the piece.
I'm not going to take any action this time on your poem, but please consider this a friendly warning and reminder. Again, thank you for contributing to r/OCPoetry. We hope you enjoy our community and become a vibrant part of our success.
~your friendly neighborhood mod, u/actualnameisLana
what was wrong i critiqued the poem based on how it made me feel and it was technically correct in most ways. nothing stood out to me as needing to be corrected so i started a discussion on the poems ultimate goal instead. which is in itself a critique because i could be completely misstating the authors intent myself furthering discussion of the poems style.
No, you talked about yourself, not the poem, and not why the poem prompted a particular emotional response.
I suggest that you read the wiki if you're still confused. :)
what people are stupid and i have to spell it out like im talking to a fifth grader? does anyone understand nuanced conversation anymore? i said one sentence about the response the poem elicited why should have been obvious there was no overt meaning. thanks for accusing the new guy of being a narcissist to, nice impression to leave on someones first time out. am i going to be able to write here or do i have to worry about being kicked the moment i type something unpopular?
People aren't "stupid", no one is asking you to write a novel, and no one is a "narcissist". Just say what you do or don't like about the poem and then include why.
And please keep Rule 2 in mind when discussing things with other users. Your last comment came dangerously close to a disrespectful ad hominem attack. Taking negatively about a poem is allowed. Being insulting to another person is definitely not allowed. Please use common courtesy when talking to others. Disrespecting others can be a ban-able offense.