Maybe some of the metaphors and phrases are a bit familiar and heavy-handed (death waits for no man)

Some great moments here are when you talk about praying and i feel like some people are shy of using rhyme in their poetry. Well you definitely know how to use it without too much trouble.

I don't know about using the same rhyme too often though. Was it intentional when you used *sleep* as the end rhyme twice?

Anyway, i hope i don't sound pompous, i don't think i'm above you artistically or some shit. You're doing the right thing channeling your life's concerns into art. You paint a very vivid picture of your mental state and that's talent.

I liked the rhyming in the beginning, it got a little repetitive and then stopped. Seems to me this could be two poems. 

[Feedback Request] Wrote this late at night. Constructively criticize me.