After years, here I am

I've been in a sexless marriage for about five years. We've been together for 11 total. He recently confessed that he just isn't into sex anymore. This is after many conversations, countless nights of me crying myself to sleep, initiating and being turned down, and a lot of horrible pity sex.

I am, however, still VERY interested in sex, and I have had someone pursuing me for several years. I've avoided him, blown him off, told him I can't do it and never will, even though I want to. He kept trying. I am really lucky that I just had a very enthusiastic person there for the taking and all I had to do was come to my damn senses.

I finally went through with it and it was AMAZING. This is a LD arrangement, and also D/S. No guilt, no regrets, and I will be fucking only him.

Feels really weird as a woman to have finally allowed this to happen for myself. Since then it's been painfully obvious that the slightest whisper of sexual availability will just make dick magically appear. It's done wonders for me, in ways I never imagined. I was fully convinced I was some hideous unloveable, unwantable monstrosity. That is just not true.

So anyway. I wanted to say hi to my people.