Best Pizza Guy of All Time?

So the site I used to work at during my supremely short tenure as a guard was an interesting one. Office plaza with 6 or so addresses all rolled into one building. Attached to a major public transit hub. 24/7 gym. Mostly offices but with a small mall. Food court with 4 or so little restaurants for the office peons or people waiting for connecting trains/buses to eat at.

The thing about the office tenants is, they're all special snowflakes how demand any/all numbers of security measures in place to prevent "undesirables" from accessing their space or really anything. In some areas of the building, security is so tight that there are direct alarms to emergency services that can trigger on security card passback or tailgating. Obviously some systems are pretty cutting edge like that, others are like "what the fuck how is this even still allowed to exist," but the point I'm making is that if someone shows up at the security desk, I don't really care how many pizza boxes he's carrying, I'm not going to give him more information than I'd be able to give to a member of the public. If he has a legitimate delivery he should be receiving instructions from the person that works in the office he's delivering to, not from me, unless it's been arranged ahead of time.

Now because this is a story about a particularly horrible food delivery person, I'd like to take just a moment to point out that most couriers are extremely competent, hardworking and professional, very straight forward about what they are trying to get done, and very accepting of what I can and cannot do for them. I've literally had problems with >1% of couriers I've ever dealt with in a security capacity, and most of those were just lost navigating our (admittedly complicated) building. I have myself worked as a food delivery courier for Uber eats, at one point full time, at one point in my spare time, so I'm aware that things may be frustrating at times, however, the best way to get where you're going quickly in a big building is always to co-operate with the on-duty guards.

So I'm on desk duty during a quiet day shift, on or about 1400, when a man in <local chain pizza store uniform> heavily laden with pizza approaches my desk.

Pizzaguy: Hey I've got some pizza here for <company with many different, not connected offices in my building>, can you give me a hand on where to find them?

Ugh. <Company> has very long term leases on about 12 floors of this building. There's really no telling which of these offices pizzaguy is trying to get to without further information. This company also has no reception aside from a mailroom, where theoretically all couriers should go to, from which mail is routed to the other offices in the building.

Me: (courteously explains that the company he mentioned has many offices in the building, and that there's a mailroom I can send him to if he likes, but he'll need to trade me his drivers license/keys for a freight elevator passcard to get to - yeah I know couriers don't always have to ride freight with food but it's all standard site procedure here. I also offer to examine his delivery manifest to see if there's a specific address/floor I can direct him to - there is not.)

Pizzaguy: Well can you call <company> and let them know I'm down here?

Me: Unfortunately I don't have a contact in <Company> that I authorized to call for these purposes. However your manifest has a phone number on it - I suggest you call that number and get an address and floor number. After that, I can direct you to where you need to go, or even walk you up.

Pizzaguy: Can't you call it?

Me: (Kind of getting pissed at this guy now, enough to where I'm not going to go out of my way to do his job for him, beyond giving him directions) I'm afraid this is really more your job at this point. If you have an address and floor number I'd be happy to direct you to it, but ultimately with the information you've given me I can't help you.

Pizzaguy: Where's your manager?

My manager's not at the desk at that moment so I give him the business card. Site procedure states that I have to give out that information on request - don't worry, it's literally the front desk number and if my manager doesn't want to deal with an idiot than he doesn't have to. It's not like I rolled over for the guy or anything.

Pizzaguy: You're a fucking cunt asshole. (he storms off).

I took a few notes about the encounter and about 5 minutes later my manager The Security Director (Call him this or get bitched out by a dude with rotted out teeth) returns and shooes me away to go patrol. As I am patrolling near the garage exit, the pizzaguy speeds past me flipping me off. Haha whatever, I guess he delivered his shit and he's out of my hair now.

Not 10 minutes later I'm back at the desk as my manager has decided he needs to take an hour-long smoke break, and the phone rings. I pick it up.

Voice on the phone: string of expletives

I recognize the voice - it's the pizza guy! And the moron's name is showing up on caller ID! I quickly take a note of it before telling him not to call back and hanging up on him.

The guy actually calls back like 5 times to cuss me out. Every time I take a careful note of his name, the phone number, the time of call, what was said, everything, while essentially being polite but curt, and at the first opportunity, informing him that he is not to call back and hanging up the phone.

After the 5th time I decide that I'd had enough of his shit. I hang up the phone and dial up <local chain pizza store> after navigating through some menus, I manage to get a human on the phone. He's very interested to hear about what one of his delivery drivers was up to! Since I was able to give him the guy's name and phone number, as well as narrow down the location the driver worked at by giving him the site's address, he says he's able to file a report and escalate it right away. I tell him the company should call back on my personal phone when a solution has been found.

About half an hour later, I get a call on my cell from an unknown number. It's the owner of the franchise that the pizza guy worked at. He and I chat for a bit - it didn't sound like he got the full story from corporate so, using my notes, I gave him all the details. I told him that that driver was no longer welcome to deliver to this address (I gave him all 6 of our building's addresses), that we had his face recorded on camera (we did) and that if he was caught calling again or on site, he would be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law. The franchise owner thanked me and hung up.

Another hour later I get another call from the franchise owner. The pizza guy had actually been let go over it. I actually expected some more harassing calls or for the guy to show up but I guess the threats of legal action I made were passed on and he decided that entertaining me wasn't worth even more hassle.